Dear Diary,
Thus far I have talked about things that I felt were somewhat important or thought provoking, even if only to me. And this entry is no different; well maybe it’s a little different. This entry is about involuntary attempted suicide. What is involuntary attempted suicide? In my case that would be my body trying to kill me while my mind has no knowledge of my body’s treason. You are still not sure what I’m talking about, I can be clearer but you are probably not going to like it.
Yesterday I was driving home and I was feeling rather gassy, I knew it wasn’t going to wait till I got home, and I was in the car by myself so I let ‘er rip. I know this is not something anyone wants to know. It was the worst smell I have ever smelled. My eyes got all water and I could barely breath, I hesitated to roll down the window because it was raining. Then my brain function returned and reminded me that it was a little water as apposed to imminent death. know not what you were planning to read today, I’m sorry but where else can you talk about a near death experience like this?
Untile next time,Me
That is just tooo funny!!
ReplyDeleteI once got pulled over for speeding. I was soo upset about it, that I had let one fly. You know how your digestive tract reacts when you're upset, right?? or is it just me?
Anyways, the officer approaced my window. I of course had to open it. As he stuck his head close, the fog hit him. I told him I was speeding cause I needed to get home in a hurry and didnt feel good, and that I was only less than a mile from home (see the address on my license?).
I think he believed me. He let me go!
Oh...don't miss my post for the letter M tomorrow. You might get a kick out of it
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