Dear Diary,
Yep I'm complaining again. Today's complaint is my new pet peeve; not responding to correspondence. I get that sometimes you want to think about something before you reply. I understand, but just say that. How hard would it be to say "I'd like to give this a little thought I'll get back to you shortly"? Maybe it's because I'm unemployed that people do not feel my time is valuable (factoring in the amount of time I spend watching T.V. shows and movies they may have a point) but I've found that I'm not getting responses.
I was planning on hitting up a couple stores that I knew APF would enjoy so I sent a text saying I was going and asked if APF would like to tag along. NOTHING, that's right no response at all. I waited hours to see if APF would reply but that was days ago and still nothing. I told some other friends that there was an event taking place near their house that SO and I would be interested in if they were free (I also told them there was no pressure because there was an event by us that we would also enjoy if they were not free). NOTHING, like I never even sent the message. Not to mention the hundreds of job applications I have sent out without hearing anything, not even a quick "Your skills do not match what we are looking for".
These are the examples that are fresh in my mind but I know there are more. I just don't understand, my feelings are not going to be hurt, I get that just because I don't have a life and can do things last minute doesn't mean other people can, but don't leave me hanging. Tell me you don't have the time, that you are not interested in the activity, or you just don't want to do whatever it is. Tell me I'm not a candidate for the job so I can scratch it off my list. I will understand, but radio silence? That just sucks.
Until next time,
Me
Showing posts with label complaining. Show all posts
Showing posts with label complaining. Show all posts
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
mostly good but a little bad
Dear Diary,
I find that I don't have any complaints right now, at least no complaints I haven't already told you about. That's awesome right! So now you are wondering ... what's the bad part? The bad part is I don't really have anything to say. Does this mean that my new awesome on-line public diary is really just a big complaint file box? In an effort to make that statement untrue I'm going to tell you about our garden. We have four plants in containers! What, it counts as a garden! So excited for fresh veggies and herbs.
Until next time,
Me
I find that I don't have any complaints right now, at least no complaints I haven't already told you about. That's awesome right! So now you are wondering ... what's the bad part? The bad part is I don't really have anything to say. Does this mean that my new awesome on-line public diary is really just a big complaint file box? In an effort to make that statement untrue I'm going to tell you about our garden. We have four plants in containers! What, it counts as a garden! So excited for fresh veggies and herbs.
Until next time,
Me
Saturday, March 5, 2011
Roommates can be friends, but friends should never be roommates
Dear Diary,
I have wanted to write about this for a while, but I'm having a hard time articulating exactly what I'm feeling and experiencing. I have a feeling this is going to be a rambling post with thought tangents branching out in all directions, but we will see. The topic that I'm going to attempt to tackle is how living with BB has changed our friendship, my views of BB and my views of myself.
The most general way to put this is that by living with BB I have somehow lost my best buddy. BB will always be one of my closest pals, but there is an element that died when we became roommates. First off being around someone all the time is quite different than hanging out with someone (generally during good times) then going home to different locations. When you are hanging out you naturally interact the whole time, because you will have your quiet alone time latter, but when you live with someone it's hard to know when the other person is enjoying quiet alone time and you will be intruding and when they would welcome an interruption. Also when I am moving from one location to another location and I pass BB, there is an awkwardness. I feel I have to acknowledge BB or seem rude, but at the same time I was on my way to do something and don't want to get involved in a conversation right then.
Mostly I miss the open communication that is natural between best buddies. Normally when a roommate does something to annoy you but it's not something you feel is confrontation worthy, you rant about it to your best buddy and they have your back, even when it's something stupid like not rinsing out the dishrag after using it. If your best buddy is your roommate, where do you turn? When you and your significant other have a disagreement, you hash it out with your best buddy. If you live with your significant other and your best buddy that puts your best buddy in an awkward situation because they have to live with your significant other too.
I have learned a lot about BB that is hard to reconcile with the person I knew before, or thought I knew. For the longest time I was under the impression that BB was much smarter than I was, but living together I have learned that BB is trivia fact smart. I guess I was under the impression that because BB was the first to speak up and replied with confidence BB must be correct, even if I was thinking something else was correct. Previous to our living together, I was under the impression that BB's stories were closer to the actual event, rather than as embellished as I see they are. I have learned that BB struggles with self esteem when before I was under the impression that BB was confident and unfazed by the remarks of others.
I have learned that I am a stronger person than I believed. I have realized that by comparing myself to how I perceived other people was not fair to me and was skewing my self perception, because no matter how it seems everyone has their own struggles. I have learned that I judge those I care about harsher than I judge strangers. I hold the people I care about to standards that are sometimes unrealistic for who they are. I am now aware that I need to work on acceptance and understanding of my loved ones. I understand that even your best buddy wants you to see them in the best light possible and hide their flaws. My eyes have been opened to the fact that no matter how annoying BB is, no matter how embellished BB's stories are, no matter how many times BB takes credit for my thoughts or insights, no matter how much I secretly cuss BB; I will always be there for BB and I will always care about BB. I only hope that when we are no longer roommates we can renew our friendship to what it was before.
Until next time,
Me
I have wanted to write about this for a while, but I'm having a hard time articulating exactly what I'm feeling and experiencing. I have a feeling this is going to be a rambling post with thought tangents branching out in all directions, but we will see. The topic that I'm going to attempt to tackle is how living with BB has changed our friendship, my views of BB and my views of myself.
The most general way to put this is that by living with BB I have somehow lost my best buddy. BB will always be one of my closest pals, but there is an element that died when we became roommates. First off being around someone all the time is quite different than hanging out with someone (generally during good times) then going home to different locations. When you are hanging out you naturally interact the whole time, because you will have your quiet alone time latter, but when you live with someone it's hard to know when the other person is enjoying quiet alone time and you will be intruding and when they would welcome an interruption. Also when I am moving from one location to another location and I pass BB, there is an awkwardness. I feel I have to acknowledge BB or seem rude, but at the same time I was on my way to do something and don't want to get involved in a conversation right then.
Mostly I miss the open communication that is natural between best buddies. Normally when a roommate does something to annoy you but it's not something you feel is confrontation worthy, you rant about it to your best buddy and they have your back, even when it's something stupid like not rinsing out the dishrag after using it. If your best buddy is your roommate, where do you turn? When you and your significant other have a disagreement, you hash it out with your best buddy. If you live with your significant other and your best buddy that puts your best buddy in an awkward situation because they have to live with your significant other too.
I have learned a lot about BB that is hard to reconcile with the person I knew before, or thought I knew. For the longest time I was under the impression that BB was much smarter than I was, but living together I have learned that BB is trivia fact smart. I guess I was under the impression that because BB was the first to speak up and replied with confidence BB must be correct, even if I was thinking something else was correct. Previous to our living together, I was under the impression that BB's stories were closer to the actual event, rather than as embellished as I see they are. I have learned that BB struggles with self esteem when before I was under the impression that BB was confident and unfazed by the remarks of others.
I have learned that I am a stronger person than I believed. I have realized that by comparing myself to how I perceived other people was not fair to me and was skewing my self perception, because no matter how it seems everyone has their own struggles. I have learned that I judge those I care about harsher than I judge strangers. I hold the people I care about to standards that are sometimes unrealistic for who they are. I am now aware that I need to work on acceptance and understanding of my loved ones. I understand that even your best buddy wants you to see them in the best light possible and hide their flaws. My eyes have been opened to the fact that no matter how annoying BB is, no matter how embellished BB's stories are, no matter how many times BB takes credit for my thoughts or insights, no matter how much I secretly cuss BB; I will always be there for BB and I will always care about BB. I only hope that when we are no longer roommates we can renew our friendship to what it was before.
Until next time,
Me
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Self Diagnosing
Dear Diary,
Do you know what bugs me? Self Diagnosing. I know people who look at symptoms and decide what is wrong with them, maybe based on past experience, maybe based on a little google research, but mostly based on a combination of what they are hoping is the wrong and what will sound the most sympathy worth. My younger sibling (YS from now on) is really good at self diagnosing physical symptoms like if YS has a cough it must be a cold, unless YS wants to go somewhere and a cold would interfere with desired plans, then it's just allergies. Also self diagnosing is convenient because the diagnoses can change as needed. YS wanted to go out the night before and tells everyone it's fine it's just allergies, but the next day when YS was supposed to clean, "I can't I just don't have the energy I have a terrible cold". This is not such a big deal since YS lives alone and not cleaning doesn't affect anyone else, but it's an example I've heard numerous times.
The self diagnosing that bugs me most is the mental diagnoses. BB's favorite self diagnoses is OCD neat freak. I'm going to point out I have seen no evidence that would lead anyone to believe this diagnosis is accurate, but that doesn't stop BB from sharing this self diagnoses with the world as though it were an actual diagnoses. What I do have is evidence that this diagnosis is not fitting for BB. BB has some indoor pets (Okay this is a personal belief, but I do not think that a true OCD neat freak would have an indoor pet) since these pets live indoors they potty indoors, BB does not seem to smell their potty as strongly or as quickly as SO and I because BB does not clean the potty as often as SO and I would prefer. Also BB, SO and I have lived together for many months now and BB never cleans unless out of town company is coming over and then only if it is BB's company. That means that in the many months we have lived here BB has vacuumed twice, let me repeat that for you in capitol letters so it sinks in BB HAS ONLY VACUUMED TWICE. What OCD neat freak can go months with out vacuuming? I can't even go weeks without vacuuming and I honestly do not think I'm a neat freak. The OCD part looking at that on it's own, there are things that BB likes a certain way, like where the table is in the eat in kitchen. Do I think this is a sign of OCD no I think it has more to do with BB trying to assert authority, and I stubbornly move the table farther into the corner and out of the way on a regular basis (maybe that means I'm OCD, no it means I like the table out of the way so I can get to the washing machine).
What really baffles me about the mental self diagnosing, why would you want people to think you have mental problems? Even if you really thought you had a problem, wouldn't you talk to your shrink about it and try to overcome these problems? Did I miss the memo that having a mental disorder was a good thing, is it hip now? I have no problem with people embracing their quirky habits. If you are a neat freak, love who you are. If you are NOT don't tell people you are, you should love YOUR QUIRKS not some other persons quirks.
Until next time,
Me
Do you know what bugs me? Self Diagnosing. I know people who look at symptoms and decide what is wrong with them, maybe based on past experience, maybe based on a little google research, but mostly based on a combination of what they are hoping is the wrong and what will sound the most sympathy worth. My younger sibling (YS from now on) is really good at self diagnosing physical symptoms like if YS has a cough it must be a cold, unless YS wants to go somewhere and a cold would interfere with desired plans, then it's just allergies. Also self diagnosing is convenient because the diagnoses can change as needed. YS wanted to go out the night before and tells everyone it's fine it's just allergies, but the next day when YS was supposed to clean, "I can't I just don't have the energy I have a terrible cold". This is not such a big deal since YS lives alone and not cleaning doesn't affect anyone else, but it's an example I've heard numerous times.
The self diagnosing that bugs me most is the mental diagnoses. BB's favorite self diagnoses is OCD neat freak. I'm going to point out I have seen no evidence that would lead anyone to believe this diagnosis is accurate, but that doesn't stop BB from sharing this self diagnoses with the world as though it were an actual diagnoses. What I do have is evidence that this diagnosis is not fitting for BB. BB has some indoor pets (Okay this is a personal belief, but I do not think that a true OCD neat freak would have an indoor pet) since these pets live indoors they potty indoors, BB does not seem to smell their potty as strongly or as quickly as SO and I because BB does not clean the potty as often as SO and I would prefer. Also BB, SO and I have lived together for many months now and BB never cleans unless out of town company is coming over and then only if it is BB's company. That means that in the many months we have lived here BB has vacuumed twice, let me repeat that for you in capitol letters so it sinks in BB HAS ONLY VACUUMED TWICE. What OCD neat freak can go months with out vacuuming? I can't even go weeks without vacuuming and I honestly do not think I'm a neat freak. The OCD part looking at that on it's own, there are things that BB likes a certain way, like where the table is in the eat in kitchen. Do I think this is a sign of OCD no I think it has more to do with BB trying to assert authority, and I stubbornly move the table farther into the corner and out of the way on a regular basis (maybe that means I'm OCD, no it means I like the table out of the way so I can get to the washing machine).
What really baffles me about the mental self diagnosing, why would you want people to think you have mental problems? Even if you really thought you had a problem, wouldn't you talk to your shrink about it and try to overcome these problems? Did I miss the memo that having a mental disorder was a good thing, is it hip now? I have no problem with people embracing their quirky habits. If you are a neat freak, love who you are. If you are NOT don't tell people you are, you should love YOUR QUIRKS not some other persons quirks.
Until next time,
Me
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